we have pet lesbian snakes
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
Randomize
