I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
did you just send me my own nude
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
