Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
