Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
