Are we in a gay sports bar?
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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