How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Randomize
