I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
