he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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