I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
