Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(251): View more from Alabama

i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.

Fav 20 800 4005
share tweet
(858): View more from California

I'll start drinking again when I know where I am

Fav 24 5158 989
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(515): View more from Iowa

So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.

Fav 11 3415 931
share tweet
(215): View more from Pennsylvania

just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.

Fav 17 4415 1076
share tweet
29 Unspoken Rules Of “Bro Code”
Read it at the TFLN blog
(205): View more from Alabama

Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.

Fav 43 1950 4384
share tweet
(570): View more from Pennsylvania

How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"

Fav 26 6816 1302
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(303): View more from Colorado

I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.

Fav 10 2077 759
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(208): View more from Idaho

Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.

Fav 1 527 669
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(585): View more from New York

When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.

Fav 1 79 104
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT