So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
