I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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