I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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