sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Randomize
