I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
She told me I should be a condom model.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Randomize
