I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
