I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
