and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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