Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
