What a fucking waste of an outfit
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
