Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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