either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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