office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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