still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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