i just wanna soil my oats bro
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Houston, we have a blender
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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