that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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