Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
True college students do jello shots in the library
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