No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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