we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
It was like giving head to a cactus.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Randomize
