As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
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