He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize
