Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
