we're blogging at a bar
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
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