Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Randomize
