its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
