I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Send help, water and tortillas.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
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