maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
