If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Randomize
