The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
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