I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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