the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
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