scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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