all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
It was like getting head from an anaconda
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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