In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize