Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
