we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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