At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
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