i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Randomize