Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize