Texts From Last Night

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  (309): View more from Illinois

  is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?

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  (309): is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring? http://tfl.nu/8ib1
  Replies (42) Good night (1476) Bad night (4223)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.

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  (812): I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads. http://tfl.nu/xmw8
  Replies (33) Good night (8384) Bad night (646)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on

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  (630): i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on http://tfl.nu/rm4w
  Replies (17) Good night (5381) Bad night (1040)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.

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  (919): Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time. http://tfl.nu/r3pt
  Replies (9) Good night (4958) Bad night (1248)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.

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  (937): Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not. http://tfl.nu/7iqg
  Replies (9) Good night (4419) Bad night (1305)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1

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  (419): So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1 http://tfl.nu/tz8w
  Replies (35) Good night (6735) Bad night (1166)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table

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  (508): Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table http://tfl.nu/id1h
  Replies (10) Good night (4496) Bad night (1171)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.

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  (904): I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative. http://tfl.nu/a3af
  Replies (7) Good night (1487) Bad night (731)
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!

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  (913): To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor! http://tfl.nu/4jfz
  Replies (10) Good night (1958) Bad night (632)
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  (507): View more from Minnesota

  My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.

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  (507): My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu. http://tfl.nu/j0iq
  Replies (8) Good night (810) Bad night (1263)
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  (417): View more from Missouri

  After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing

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  (417): After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing http://tfl.nu/he4t
  Replies (11) Good night (1168) Bad night (449)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.

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  (208): Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order. http://tfl.nu/2umc
  Replies (3) Good night (430) Bad night (616)
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  (228): View more from Mississippi

  I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again

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  (228): I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again http://tfl.nu/bu4d
  Replies (2) Good night (803) Bad night (323)
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night

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  (701): I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night http://tfl.nu/x7bo
  Replies (1) Good night (284) Bad night (495)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.

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  (617): He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer. http://tfl.nu/nrwh
  Replies (0) Good night (193) Bad night (387)

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