In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
