Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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