Screwed.edu
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
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