no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
